shut the fuck up!

I wake up in my bed
Look around

Who am I?
The room feels wrong

My skin feels tight
I don’t recognize my life
Don’t fit in anywhere
No one understands me
Does everyone hate me?
Why do I feel this empty?

My emotions feel like a rollercoaster
Happy

Then sad

Then mad
Crying

Missing someone
Hating another

Now I’m laughing
Now I’m mad again
Now I’m happy

What?
Why does it hurt so much
Just to be me?

It hurts

It hurts

It hurts so much
My head won’t ever shut the fuck up
Every thought is way too loud
I’m losing grip

I’m breaking down

All the voices in my head
They’re screaming at me
Pulling me apart instead
Like they’re trying to end me
Talking over one another
Never letting me breathe
I’m fighting with my own mind
And it won’t fight fair with me

Happy

Sad

Mad

Cry
Miss you

Hate you

Laugh

Why?
Every feeling at once
I’m crushed by the weight of all of this noise

It hurts

It hurts

It hurts so much
My head won’t ever shut the fuck up
Stop these thoughts

Stop

Shut up
Why am I stuck inside this rush?

​

It hurts

It hurts

It hurts so much
My head won’t ever shut the fuck up
Stop these thoughts

Stop

Shut up
Why am I stuck inside this rush?

It hurts

It hurts

It hurts so much
I wanna fucking die
Take my brain out
Soak it in bleach
Clean it

Clean it
Make it quiet
Stop these thoughts
Stop

Shut up

Who am I?
Who am I?
Who am I?